If you would’ve told me as a kid that I would end up in the New York Times someday, I would've told you that you’re crazy. I also would have asked, “What’s a New York Times?”
I was a country kid. I grew up in Jetmore, and spent my free time barefoot in the creek. New York City was where bad salsa came from (some of you will get that). I didn’t even know anyone who’d been to New York City. I also didn’t know anyone trans, and yet, somehow I ended up there as well.
Kansas has always felt like home to me, even when my body didn’t. Eventually, who everyone thought was a little country girl has grown into a man (with a full beard thanks to gender affirming care) who still loves fishing, shooting and making homemade peach jam.
Free Staters are Losing Their Freedoms
There was a time when Kansas was known as a “free state,” thanks to our refusal to allow slavery. I’m a big John Brown fan. A journalist at the New York Tribune, Horace Greeley, came up with the phrase “Bleeding Kansas,” to describe the bloody fight for personal freedoms.
I wish Kansas still made headlines for being brave. Now, we’re making national news for being cowards. Apparently, keeping trans people out of bathrooms is how we’re defining “freedom” in Kansas nowadays.
A reporter from the New York Times sat in my living room in Larned just a few short months ago, and wrote an article about the erosion of trans rights in Kansas titled, “What’s Happening in Kansas Should Alarm Us All.” The fascist-like crackdown of SB 244 on which genitals can release urine into which toilets is not only a giant waste of time and taxpayer resources, but a huge overstep in government power. (Tread on us, I guess?)
Compliance Causes Confusion and Chaos
Recently I helped coordinate an act of “malicious compliance” for trans men, although “malicious” makes it sounds like it harmed someone. It did not. Well, except people’s feelings online.
So what was it that these men did? Used the women’s bathroom. As SB 244 dictates, Kansans must use multi-stall restrooms that align with “biological sex assigned at birth.” Presumably, these men weren’t born with penises, therefore, they must use the women’s restroom.
Only, these men DON’T look like women. That’s the point of gender affirming care. Many had beards, short hair, deep voices, and dressed as average Midwest dudes. They’ve been using the men’s restroom for YEARS with no incident.
And guess what happened? The police were called. “There are guys in the women’s bathroom!!!” Correct. This is what you wanted, right?
These acts, performed by the “Compliance Crew,” also drew national media attention, and the story spread like a Flint Hills grass burn on a dry, windy day.
I know they say “don’t read the comments,” but I couldn’t help myself. It was both alarming and
hilarious. One person pointed out something very funny about the yellow t-shirts and blue jeans, which honestly, we should have seen coming, “Props to these guys but why did they dress like Minions?” Fair.
One armchair expert wrote, “I can tell these are just gay dudes trying to cop a feel!” First of all, thank you for acknowledging that they are, in fact, dudes. Very gender affirming of you! Second, why would GAY men be trying to cop a feel in a WOMEN’S bathroom? Not sure what that was all about.
While many comments were either incredibly supportive or incredulous that Kansas actually has a law about such things, some commenters demonstrated exactly where they feel that trans Kansans belong…nowhere. They’d rather we just cease to exist, which must be what CPAC (Conservative Political Action Committee) speaker Michael Knowles was referring to when he said, “transgenderism must be eradicated from public life entirely.”
The NPR article about the demonstration pointed out what happened in Dodge City, and was the most alarming part about the whole ordeal: “The protesters said they had to describe their genitalia to officers — an exchange that lasted roughly 20 minutes. After the description officers told the crew members they were free to go.”
Yes, you read that correctly. These Kansans were asked to DESCRIBE THEIR GENITALIA. Can you imagine this happening to you? Because if it happens to these trans Kansans, it can happen to anyone. What happens when someone merely “suspects” you of being trans?
Again, where is that freedom we’re supposedly so proud of?
All Eyes on Kansas
I’m not an attention-seeking person, but I refuse to shy away from the spotlight if it means informing and educating the rest of the country about what’s going on here. It is a strange feeling, though, to be one minute minding my own business going to physical therapy after shoulder surgery, and the next being thrust into the national media landscape for another 15 minutes of fame.
The attention is important, but it’s not paying my medical bills. And apparently, the Kansas legislature is more concerned about whether or not I’m allowed to pee in peace than if I, or any other Kansan, goes into medical bankruptcy.
When are we going to return to the courage of our founders, and call out harm being done in the name of “progress?” Kansas ranchers are losing beef business to Argentina, diesel prices are through the roof thanks to the war in Iran, and big corporations are getting back BILLIONS of dollars in "tariff refunds,” but not passing it along to the consumers who paid the higher prices to begin with.
The only Kansas lawmaker loudly pushing for the RELIEF Act which will directly help small Kansas farmers? Sharice Davids. A Democrat.
Listen, people on the coasts already look down on us for a variety of reasons. We’re in “flyover” country, and that’s mostly fine with me. Less traffic on the two-lanes.
But is this really what we want Kansas to be known for? Bigotry? Why not basketball or sunsets or cinnamon rolls or the World’s Largest Ball of Twine? We’re already ranked 39 when it comes to tourism. We could have made the most of being perceived as “quaint and cute,” but now we’re serving it up with a side of genital inspections. Gross.
Matthew Neumann
Larned
Matthew Neumann is a Larned resident and is executive director of the LGBTQ Foundation of Kansas (lgbtqks.org). The mission of LGBTQ Foundation of Kansas is to educate about LGBTQIA+ issues, work with organizations and individuals to help bring resources to Kansas communities, and assist community members in using their skills to help each other.