Raymond Walter Stithem was born March 13, 1930, to Emma (Buchholz) and Ike Stithem on the family farm northeast of WaKeeney. He was a lifelong resident of Trego County and was a pillar of the community, serving the farming and business people for over 75 years. It was, however, Ray’s family that brought him the most joy. He was united in marriage to Bernice (Billinger) on May 16, 1949, at St. Michael Church in Collyer, Kansas. Ray and Bernice met at a Collyer Dance Hall dance and later got engaged at a Collyer dance. Ray and Bernice raised six children in their family home. Over their 71 years of marriage, their family grew to include seven grandchildren, eight great-grandchildren, and one great-great-grandchild, bringing them much joy.
Ray spent his life working hard to support his family. He was always known for his ability to train and show horses and was a well-known seller and buyer of horses and tack. He also passed his love of horses on to his children, spending many hours at rodeos and horse shows around the region. Ray was one of the founders and a longtime member of the WaKeeney Livestock Commission. He conducted the weekly livestock auctions for decades, working with his business partner, Leon Fabrizius, for 59 years as Stithem and Fabrizius Auction Services. Ray was also one of the owners of the sale barn and was known and respected by cattle buyers and sellers in several states. They conducted land and farm auctions, business and equipment auctions, and household estate sales in the region. He and Leon were known as the Deans of Auctioneers in western Kansas. He started learning the business by working for Harrison and Tyrel Auctions in 1958. He noted that Mr. Harrison was like a father to him and taught him all about the business. Ray volunteered as an auctioneer for 4-H and FFA livestock auctions for over 50 years. He was honored with an Honorary FFA Membership for his many years of support.
Ray also had a mowing and snow removal business and took great pride in being a dependable worker for all his business and home customers. He continued to push snow and mow well into his 90s and never stopped worrying about his clients. He was a familiar sight around town after every snow.
Throughout his life, wherever there were horses, Ray could be found. He was one of the founding members of the WaKeeney Polo Team, playing on their field west of town on Old 40 or in Ralph Owens’ pasture. Other polo team members were Don McKinley, Carl McKinley, Dwayne Zeman, Clarence Zeman, and Al Claycamp among others. They played in a league with Hill City, Ness City, Quinter, Gorham, and Hays.
Ray also enjoyed other activities with Bernice, but dancing was always their favorite thing, along with playing cards with their friends. They could be found cutting a rug at dance halls in Voda, Collyer, WaKeeney, Ellis, and other towns. For their 50th wedding anniversary, Ray, Bernice, and their children and grandchildren went on a cruise, and one of the highlights was the dance contest for guests. Ray and Bernice outdanced every other couple on that cruise to win the contest and the matching leather jackets that were the first-place prize. They were in their 70s when they won the ship’s contest.
Ray and Bernice were also famous for the wonderful cinnamon candy they made every year at Christmas. Every year, they made huge batches of this hard, red candy and distributed them to their many friends around town. To be blessed with the gift of their candy was a real treat every Christmas, and it is a tradition carried on now by their family.
Ray was a lifelong member of Christ the King Catholic Church, achieving the rank of 3rd Degree Knight in the Knights of Columbus, where he served faithfully for 70 years. Pushing snow for the church was always a priority so people could attend mass even after the biggest snowstorms. He was a good and faithful servant.
He is survived by his children and their spouses, Kay (Harry) Bennett, Gig Harber, WA; Diane (Dave) Gross, Manhattan, KS; (Tim) Hager, WaKeeney, KS; Rhonda (Randy) Schademann, Lawrence, KS; Rob (Anna) Stithem, Colby; and Terry (Mary) Stithem, WaKeeney, KS. He is also survived by seven grandchildren, eight great-grandchildren, and one great-great-grandchild as well as a host of other family and friends
Ray Stithem was preceded in death by Bernice, his wife of 71 years, his daughter, Shirley Hager, his parents, and his sisters, Helen Balluch, Margaret Feldt, and Ruth Niernberger.
A visitation will be held on Friday, May 16, 2025, from 5:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. at Schmitt Funeral Home, 336 North 12th St., WaKeeney, with a prayer of the Rosary at 7:00 p.m. followed by a vigil at 7:30 p.m.
The Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated Saturday, May 17, at 10:00 a.m. at Christ the King Catholic Church, 412 North 9th St., WaKeeney. Interment will follow at Christ the King Cemetery, WaKeeney.